Random Thoughts For Today

So... I was rereading some more of my older journal entries and came across something that got me to thinking, AGAIN...

Is something wrong with me or am I just a normal teenager? Do normal teenagers have these thoughts and doubts? Or is something wrong with me mentally?

This one entry is about a couple different things. Like sex and suicide.
I am going to openly admit that I have thought about suicide. I have even imagined myself doing it, but I have NOT attempted it. The only reason why I have thought about it was because it made me feel better. Odd, I'm sure, but true. I would think/imagine it when my parents got angry with me or I was just plain upset about something. There really is no reason for me to have thought about it. I mean, I have a good life. I have it better than some people.
Of course, I do not think about it, anymore. I sorta stopped those thoughts a while ago. I know that suicide is NEVER the answer. It's just an "easy solution". A way to run away from your problems, not face them. Problems should be faced head on... Ha. Who am I to talk? I usually hide from my problems or put up some sort of barrier to keep them away. I rarely face them head on. Maybe that's why I can talk. Because I know how it is to not face your problems and deal with them..?

Sex.
Oh boy. That's such a difficult subject.
I will, also, openly admit that I have thought about having sex. Even though I am far too young too. I was wonder what it would be like and such. Don't worry. As a 17-yr-old, I have no intentions of having sex until I am older or married. Whichever comes first.
I know the risks that comes with having sex and I've learned from my Mom's mistake. She had me when she was 17 or 18. She even said that it was too young to have a baby. Especially in her case. She had a lot of stuff happening in such a short time. She even went to the abortion clinic, but obviously didn't go through with that. Which I'm VERY greatful for!
I want to have sex when I KNOW for sure that I am ready and can handle the consquences that come with it. Just in case I get a STD or get pregnant or whatever else can happen.
I mean, these teenagers that are having sex now are STUPID. (No offense, just my opinion) They really are because they have no clue what they're getting theirselves into. Most of the girls get pregnant and have babies. They can't handle it! Having a baby is a HUGE responsibilty and no one seems to understand. (At least, the people my age don't)
In my opinion. Sex is overrated.
But I'm sure I'll change my mind when I'm older and have experience with that.


Now. I am curious about something.
See... I have never been in a relationship or even been on a date. So, I don't know anything about that stuff.
When dealing with a guy, I go to my friends who have experience with dating.
Usually, the advice is wrong because of the guys that I attract. (Jerk-offs, losers, douches, etc)
Anyways. I have asked a lot of people and have even looked it up on the internet.
WHAT IS FLIRTING?!
There are far too many definitions to flirting, I lose track! Besides. I never know when I am flirting with a guy or not and it annoys the CRAP outta me!
It even annoys me when I'm talking to King (which is usually late at night), he says that he hits on me and flirts with me. (Not on purpose, mind you! Since he has a girlfriend, it sorta just happens)
I NEVER know when he's hitting on me or not. I'm FREAKIN' CLUELESS.
So. I ask...
Can someone help me?
Please. I could use some real advice and help on this. I'm 'bout ready to lose my mind.